PART 4
OVERCOMING PROBLEMS AND DIFFICULTIES
Whilst trying to attain your goals there will be obstacles that will get in your way.
Both physical and mental problems!
You will face setbacks thats just a fact of life. But instead of beating yourself up or giving in learn from them.
Also, have you got the attitude to succeed?
Within this lesson also I will be looking at your beliefs!
Refocusing after setbacks
How many times have you started a diet, a new way of thinking, or tried something new and then a setback occurs and you just go back to the way you were?
Don't worry, you are not the only one!
Setbacks and difficulties occur all of the time - they are a natural activity of life.
There are two ways of facing difficulties.
You either change or alter the difficulty or you can alter yourself to be able to deal with it.
Deal with difficulties correctly and it will enhance your confidence, deal with them incorrectly and they can do some serious damage to your self worth.
Your response to issues and difficulties
When you are faced with any setback your ability to deal with it can be turned around into a position of strength by asking yourself positive empowering questions.
There is an unwritten rule that says:
Ask your mind a stupid question and you will get a stupid answer!
So, if after setback you ask yourself something like
"Why does this always happen to me, I never have any luck?"
Your mind will probably come out with:
"Because you are useless and good things do not happen to you!"
Sound familiar?
Instead, if you ask yourself a positive empowering question like:
"What did I learn from this setback for next time?"
Your mind will kick into solution mode and help.
Here are some rules and things to think about when setbacks do occur:
Acknowledge that it has happened. Don't hide from it. These things happen. So what?
What positive empowering questions can you ask yourself?
What is good about this situation?
How can I make the most of this situation?
What can I learn from it?
What are the facts about this problem?
How can we make it a successful outcome?
Acknowledge that setbacks occur to everyone and you are not being singled out.
View them as a challenge to overcome rather than an issue or problem
Get your belief system right for success!
Think about the negative disempowering thoughts that you think on a regular basis after a setback.
What new empowering questions could you ask yourself to give some better answers!
Write these down now and make them a habit.
How to Develop Strong Inner Beliefs
Simple questions you can ask yourself to begin to clarify and develop your strong inner belief system, so that you can make decisions that are right for you.
Self acceptance gives you the much needed energy and room to grow
Having a strong value/inner belief system is very much dependent on our ability to accept ourselves, who we are, what we feel, how we see the world independent of what others say, think, feel and do.
The benefits of a strong inner belief system are varied and great:
Stronger self confidence
Healthy self esteem
Greater life satisfaction
Comfort with self and others
But how exactly does one go about developing this strong inner belief system?
Following are some questions for you to consider.
Finding the answers to these can help you begin to weed out the muck of "everybody else says," and get back to the purity and perfection of self-expression.
1. Explore what you currently believe: about work, life, people, yourself
Try a free writing exercise.
Write each word (work, life, etc.) at the top of a page (one for each page) and then free associate for each word.
Write down whatever thoughts might be conjured up by the word at the top of the page.
Write until each page is full.
2. How much of what you believe is your own?
Take a look at what your wrote on each page.
Identify messages that may have come from parents, friends, family, peers, teachers, etc.
Identify the recurring themes?
Now, highlight the things you feel truly reflect who you are and what you believe.
3. How much of it is enabling versus disabling?
When you look at the messages that came from others, are they enabling and empowering?
Or are they limiting?
Now, look at the ones that reflect your own inner belief systems are those empowering or limiting?
How do they make you feel?
4. What do you want to believe?
Consider your true beliefs.
Do they reflect how you want to feel about life, work, people, yourself?
Write each idea or thought down on the left hand side of a page, and on the right hand side, write how you'd like to feel/think about each instead.
Reprogram yourself by identifying these limiting thoughts as they pop into your head, and replacing them with the thoughts and ideas you identified on the right hand side instead.
If you continue this exercise, you'll find the old limiting thoughts creeping up less and less, and the new empowering thoughts will begin to take their place.
5. What messages about life, people, work, yourself did you get from family as you shaped your personality?
Be prepared.
Messages from family members will continue to get repeated by them.
If you have chosen to reprogram any of their thoughts, values and beliefs, then be prepared to counter these beliefs whenever a family member articulates them.
6. What's your response when you express your belief and someone disagrees?
Consider how you might respond, should you share your beliefs with others, and find that they disagree.
Here's a hint: don't change your mind. It's ok that someone else believes differently from you that's what makes the world go round after all.
Instead, simply state that you see life/work/people/etc. differently, and then repeat and reconfirm your belief to yourself.
As you explore your answers to these questions, and explore the exercises associated with each, you'll begin to realise that you do have a very strong belief system.
You may not always enforce or communicate it, but it's there, just as your spirit and soul give you life.
The hard part then, is in developing confidence in your ability to express, in an unwavering fashion, these beliefs.
Others will challenge, but see your ability to continue with your belief system intact as part of you own personal growth an opportunity to test your belief, and should it continue to feel solid, restate and reinforce it strongly.
Once your belief system has been strengthened, you will find that others, having less confidence in their own beliefs, will seek you out.
Grow also then, by helping and encouraging others to tap into their own belief system and follow the process you used to get where you are now.
Thats it for this module you got some homework to do!
